"And sometimes it hits me out of nowhere. All of a sudden this overwhelming sadness rushes over me. And I get discouraged and I get upset and I feel hopeless, sad and hurt. And once again, I feel numb to the world."
Three years later, a new girl sits cross-legged on your bed.
She tastes like a different flavor of bubblegum than you are used to.
She opens up a book that you had to read in high school, and a folded picture of us falls out of chapter three.
Now there are two unfinished stories resting in her lap.
Inevitably, she asks, and you tell her.
You say: I dated her a while back.
You don’t say: Sometimes, when I’m holding you, I imagine the smell of her vanilla perfume.
You say: She was younger than me.
You don’t say: The sixteen summers in her bones warmed the eighteen winters my skin had weathered.
You say: It’s nothing now.
You don’t say: But it was everything then.
"The fact is, I’d treat you so damn well. I’d give you everything I had, even if I wasn’t sure I had it to begin with. And it sucks because you want nothing to do with it. And I’m beyond caring about what I deserve or what you’re missing out on, because all I can think about is that I’m lacking something that you want in someone else. I’ll get over it, eventually. But right now, I think I’ll give myself a moment of grief, even if it’s over losing something I never had in the first place."
"I fell in love with her courage, her sincerity, and her flaming self respect."
"Climb the mountain so you can see the world, not so the world can see you."
"I never realized what a big deal that was. How amazing it is to find someone who wants to hear about all the things that go on in your head."
"One day it’s 12:27 am, and you’re sad. Not because of how life is treating you or anything, it’s just because you want someone next to you. Someone who at the end of the day will look at you and smile, asking what you want to have for dinner. You’ll realize that you are longing for love, a comfortable and simple love, one that gives you a reason to shut off the computer, and just have a conversation. You want a companion who will be there, who will be willing to give you space, and who will also keep you close. It’s hard, because as you think, the clock slowly turns to 12:30am, and you are just tired of trying, and you just want it to happen. But it will, and you’ll look back at these late nights, and smile; wishing you could tell your single self that it’s going to be okay, that all the “no’s” were leading you to a beautiful yes. So, as it gets later, you just need to remember that your sadness will be replaced with an overwhelming gratitude that you are loved; and that will be better than all the missed opportunities, and made up dreams that you had."
"I get way too sensitive when I get attached to someone. I can detect the slightest change in the tone of their voice, and suddenly I’m spending all day trying to figure out what I did wrong."